Social media and twenties have a bittersweet relationship. In fact I would readily accept that a social media timeline is one of the most sensitive topics for a mid twenty something.
What social media suddenly bursts to tell you is that you could not have it all. If there is money there isn’t time, if there is both there isn’t someone to love and if there is all three then perhaps the number of likes on your profile picture not a benchmark already.
It is a perfect case of creating a sudden divide between have and have-nots.
One may like to question who is keeping the score but mind is completely lost in the pictures of another friend’s europe trip and running a jealous commentary of its own.
Saying that getting affected by social media theatrics is perfectly normal is akin to the phrase, “To err is to human.” So yes it is perfectly fine to get jealous watching your peers picture perfect stories.
But then like everything in life there is a flip side to it. While those pictures are being the eye of your pain yours are somebody else’s .A fat good chance the very person’s whose 105 likes on profile picture haunts you.
Social media teaches us something.
It shows you to understand that you cannot live it all. You cannot and I am going to repeat win everything. I believe there is something very strangely therapeutic about social media. It opens us to the deepest darkest, most stupid desires of heart and then after a while helps us outgrow them too.
Also being a twenty something rushing into the thirty madness can be an overwhelming experience, watching many of your peers handle the same emotion becomes a great way to deal with it.
Tips to handle social media jealousy!
1. Remember there is a person behind those pictures who often cries at night recalling past mistakes, just like you!
2. The feelings of seeing those 104 likes on a profile picture last two days, most of the times even the weekend ends along with the hoopla. After party depression is scary 😀
3. They are at the end of the day your friends, if at all be also happy for them
4. If they are seen updating statuses on a saturday night and regularly replying to the 120 comments too, you think they have a life 😀 #justsaying *p.s I am that person on a Saturday night! *
5. Soon they will have kids and get married or you may reverse the order. Think of the pain when they would incessantly update your TL with pictures of them one after another. Just kidding 😀
In life nothing and I am going to say it out loud, NOTHING should make you jealous. Because remember at the end of the day no matter how cliched it sounds, the good ol grass looks a lot more greener on the other side!
You tell us have you found social media generating a lot of anxiety for you? If yes how did you handle it and if not then HOW DID YOU HANDLE IT!!
If you are taking part in A-Z blogging challenge this April, then do leave your blog link in comments, will surely link it up with my posts. Thanks!
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Nope. Not jealous. I don’t mind holiday pictures. I don’t mind friends partying pictures.
I’m just tired of seeing ‘Engaged’ —> Tons of ‘my big day’—-> Honeymoon—> Children pictures. (Only because the quicker they get married, the more pressure builds on me to get hitched by the family)
The 2 AM Writer
Hey Richa, Another Awesome post !
I would be lying if I said I Never felt jealous, at times I was !
If they are my friends no jealousy, just pure happiness otherwise seeing them Travel to countries I want to, makes me a little jealous 🙂
Visiting on the 10th day of the #atozchallenge. I love social media as a writer. Interesting to see what works. As much as I like my personal FB page, my author page has not been near as successful as my blog and Pinterest followers. The problem, as we all know is letting things like this #Challenge keep us from writing the next chapter. Find the balance in all if it is always the trick. No jealousy, but perseverance. If you have time or interest, I am writing about gardening and related topics this month. Come and visit.
another awesome post 🙂 well i cant say i nvr got jealous! have been der n done dat!
https://swathishenoy.blogspot.in/2014/04/j-for-jealousy.html?m=1
a-z participant 🙂
Great read yet again Richa…I am happy on behalf of my friends who have great times and show it:-) But then I am not in the 20′ anymore – older and muuuch more wise and confident… Ya ya 🙂 He he he
This really hit home today. With so many people traveling to exotic places for spring break over this week, I have to admit I have been a bit jealous that I had no where to go and no money to get me there. We stayed home for spring break. My son was sick all week, and the one day that I took the kids to the mall and toy store…he threw up. We should have stayed home…but I am still am glad we went and they were too. It made a memory. Awesome post! ♥
This is a very very good post, Richa. And for good reason. Social media is like a two edged sword. We cannot live with or without it. I have been on social networking sites since 2007 and most active in the last few years on facebook. I have toned it down a lot, primarily because it eats into my time. But I do enjoy the pictures, the updates, and even that stab of jealousy 😉 They all keep me grounded and I love that aspect. Today’s recommended post from me is this one 🙂
I have believed that life is not set of profile pictures…yes! I would wish that for all of us (me, my friends and all others) the life would be as nice, bright and happy as it is in the set of photos we upload.
So true this line is- “It opens us to the deepest darkest, most stupid desires of heart and then after a while helps us outgrow them too.”
Loved the post.. happy statuses while sad myself, make me jaelous too!
A very good post, Richa. What I enjoy most about social media (and I am only on FB, and G+ but that too only because of my blog), is the opportunity to stay connected with my family, friends, and a lot of others in between, who are all in several different continents and countries and time zones. And also some informational aspect of FB appeals to me. I actually enjoy seeing their vacation pics or other milestone statuses etc…though at times I do feel overburdened when there is an overdose of same type of holiday fun shots again and again 🙂 Maybe it is my age speaking here…or maybe because to me other people’s vacations really don’t matter much 🙂
Beauty Interprets, Expresses, Manifests the Eternal
Haha…love this post! Frankly have not gotten jealous over any updates from friends or foes on social media… Rather it provides quite a few chuckles and can be really amusing at times! 😉 Yes the baby pic updates in FB can get to u at times…have become more sociable due to blogging and it can get really addictive!
Well yes sometimes I do wonder why is that not me…I’m human after all…But then life goes on 🙂
Latest A2Z Challenge Post-Random Thoughts Naba
Jealousy is a green eyed monster – I learnt this in high school!!! I try to be very composed and and get jealous at certain posts or pics or at times in some groups! I think I am excelling in being non-jealous day by day…
~S(t)ri
Participant|AtoZ Challenge 2014
Smile, it makes (y)our day!
serendipity it is..just over lunch today I was telling my friends here that social media gets me into a depression mode.. It starts from family trips, pics of children ..and those picture perfect stories as you said. I am still figuring out if there is a way to overcome this feeling ..or if there is any need for it
Great post! I’ve seen pictures that even talk about love all the way to divorce which is so painful…even in the hype that’s created by social media there are things that are too obivious!
You brought a few smiles with this, Richa. Why we all do this to ourselves, I don’t know? 😉
I don’t really get jealous about much. Though sometimes I would like as many followers or likes as some other people. Overall though I am happy and satisfied with my lot in life and am aware that I need to be the change I want in life. It’s about responsibility. If you’re not happy, then you are the person who must make the changes.
Rhi
scruffy-duck.net // Welsh Bloggers
Social media is just like any other form of communication. You share with friends, be happy for them, don’t take the virtual world too seriously. Life is a whole lot more than the likes and comments on the profile pages, just have harmless fun 🙂 Great post.
So agree with your view! On a similar note this is my word too for today.
Social media just brings the green queen in highlight.
https://www.inderpreetkaur.blogspot.in/2014/04/jealous-or-justified.html?m=1
A few years ago, my sister who is a party animal shared with me the story behind the gorgeous, happy pictures on Facebook. It is certainly not what it seems! Each one has their own unique battles to fight! So we should not at all get worked up because of all those cruise pics or dine out at exclusive joints…. No, never!! 🙂
As rightly pointed out, none can be indifferent to all there pressure – peer pressure to be specific. But then life has to move on and put your mind onto something else :-)…I can’t explain to myself that in one of the blog forum, for specific few people, whatever is the content, they are all rated top blogs in no time.. I salute them for their capability to garner that much fan following and just focus on something else :-)..
Great post, Richa and one I’m sure we can all relate to, even those of us who were in their twenties years ago…Sigh….
It’s so true that what we see online is only what people want us to see, their better selves. The hidden messy, painful side stays hidden unless it’s one of those people who tells all. I have felt jealous on occasion of people taking glamourous vacations or other writers having yet another book published when I have yet to have one. Yep, I know what you’re talking about. I do enjoy social media but I have to remind myself it’s not reality as sometimes I lose sight of that. Funny you mentioned the Greener Grass syndrome as that’s what I did for letter G.
https://cattitudeandgratitude.blogspot.ca/2014/04/j-is-for-jupiter.html
yes, there have been many times when I have felt so lonely, thinking how every other person has so many active friends who like and comment and ask to hang out etc etc… maybe its fake maybe its virtual but we never know.. what we see is what registers in our mind..
Excellent post, Richa. I have been working in the field of social media for five years. This requires me to be on social media 24X7. The interesting point I want to mention is that when we all started using social media – it was to catch up, interact and update each other about what’s happening. However, the trend changed more towards a competitive spirit of showing posh places we go to, kids and their certificates/medals/picture perfect birthday parties, foreign tours and even intimate family moments and friends get togethers could not be even casually clicked without ppl saying ‘Wait, i don’t look good enough to be tagged on Facebook.’
I am some one who loves to see others being happy so I don’t feel jealous. However, when I see even very close friends “pretend” to be something they are not on Facebook, that disturbs me and my understanding of their real persona. There are very few people who are genuinely themselves on social media and that itself is an act of both defiance and courage.
I agree with the tips you stated here and the reminder ‘The grass always looks greener than on the other side’ so none of us should even be remotely bothered about how many “Likes” our FB profile pic got or our updates got. It doesn’t really matter if you are a happy person within.
Well said!
Could be the age difference, but jealousy isn’t in my repertoire of emotions. I’m always delighted for my friends when something good happens to them. ☺ Also fine if they’re more popular than I am; what does it matter in the grand scheme of things? I do what I do, they do what they do. <>
Everybody’s life is different. 😉
I’m with Debbie – she took the words out of my mouth. Jealousy isn’t part of my make up either – I left that a long long long time ago.
Very well written and apt. Why benchmark our lives against only the ‘best’ of someone else’s life?
to be honest, Social Media do not make me jealous, instead I feel inspired time to time seeing all those achievements they share, while choosing to ignore the darker side of it…if any.
Great post.
Amritt
So True. I wouldn’t blame social media. I would rather blame the way people take things too seriously and the way they react to it.
Ha ha.. Nice one Richa! I like the pointers. I very much agree, social media is just like a business, people put up their best foot forward and all the glorious pictures while there is a lot more to their lives as well and even they do have problems like us.
I am sure there would be people who would be extremely jealous of our social profiles as well. But I guess that’s social media, it never gives the full picture!
Ha ha ha to me doesn’t matter.It is me who constantly keep on posting pictures as I travel almost always.But when I see my friends pic of a location I have had always wanted to be,I like but I wish they take me with them 😉