Needless to say I got very disturbed and yes may have shed a few tears alone at night.
This is not me, I decided and hence next morning I got up and got talking. I started to babble to my husband all that I had experienced. And very slowly with every passing word it got better. It felt like it needed a closure in terms of being let out of me.
In this run up of life, don’t forget to forgive yourself.
Yes you and I have made some very bad decisions and at times been at the mercy of someone else’s. But then that is what makes us, right. The good, the bad the ugly. All contribute to what we often call a brilliant life!
The first and foremost thing to do post twenty five is to sit down and simply spell out all that needs forgiving and more importantly forgetting.
What is it that I forgive myself for today?
For being very rude to my father while growing up. I still regret it and try to make up whenever I can
In my rush to become a grown up I never allowed myself the fun of being a child. I forgive my younger self for it and compensate by being one now!
Giving up on my magazine when I was twenty and it was thriving. It gave me enough to continue in life still.
Of course you too have to do this for me. Write down what you feel you have to let go, past mistakes or regrets , let it out. If not in here on the blog then perhaps to a near and dear one. Believe me it helps..
If you are taking part in A-Z blogging challenge this April, then do leave your blog link in comments, will surely link it up with my posts. Thanks!
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Hey Richa, The more I read your blogs, I realize “WE are more similar than Different”.
I admire you for sharing your inner most feeling with us, I know how difficult that is.
We all need to Learn to forgive ourselves, or at least keep trying !
Richa, you got me thinking. If I were to spell out everything I need to forgive myself about, I’m pretty sure I can kiss office bye bye tomorrow. But it’ll be good to try!
The 2 AM Writer
I have to forgive myself for giving up on a friendship that I treasured so much in college.. I tried to mend things but it didn’t work…I know deep down I still blame myself for it whereas I shouldn’t…Yes that’s what I need to forgive myself for…
Another gr8 one Richa!
Very strong advise. Yes so many times we do not forgive ourselves. What you said about your childhood …I could relate so much to it. I think I spent my twenties regretting the past and waiting for the future to happen. It is only now I have come to terms with living in the present. Ofcourse past always remains but you can’t live in it π
A very different topic, amidst a whole bunch who would write about ‘forgive others!’ π nice, at times, we need to take a break, analyse, judge and even forgive ourself.. nice one, richa!
Its tough to forgive yourself and let go the things we can’t change! Nice post!
Nibha
You HAVE to forgive yourself for things you regret… and the moment you do, you feel 100 pounds lighter.
My whole memoir that I released last year is written around this theme. So I certainly related. I think the hardest person to forgive is ourselves. https://batteredhope.blogspot.com
It took me years to forgive myself for giving up on the relationship with my sister. She always had such hatred for me and once my Dad died there simply was no reason for me to put up with her abuse anymore. I realized I did it for him. Once he wasn’t here anymore, I didn’t have to put up with her or her lies, drama, and abuse. I cut ties. Your post touched a chord with me.
Forgiveness is an interesting concept… but once we are capable of it,it’s a huge burden off our shoulders. Whether it is ourselves or others…
Forgiveness! That’s gonna be my letter F! And you’re right about forgiving oneself…I think that takes the biggest toll on a person’s life more than forgiving others! Great post!
Forgiving oneself is another form of ‘letting go’ past baggage !! And not all of us can do that easily… I’ll have to try and do that. We seem to be the most critical of ourselves always !!
It sure is hard to forgive oneself. But I try. Infact I think that is one of my new year resolutions π
#AprilA2Zchallenge
https://www.ourowncorner.com/poohsden/
So well said Richa, it is imp to let go and move on to forgive yourself. I think acceptance of your feelings, of who you are is the first step in this direction and then of course self love!
I have to forgive myself for lot of things that I said and did to loved ones!! I forgiven myself because I somehow made it right. However, there are certain things that I still wonder why I did and I wish I never did!! Did I rant a lot? blame on your post!! It was so good that it made me rant
~S(t)ri
Participant|AtoZ Challenge 2014
Smile, it makes (y)our day!
and that is the best gift you can give to yourself. Forgiveness. π
Certainly, this too is part of growing up. Regret keeps us chained to the past agony and pain…moving on with what is here today and learning from past mistakes is part of forgiving oneself.
Forgiving ourselves is very necessary. Guilt and self-pity are the two most irrelevant emotions, says a wise person I know. I wholeheartedly agree!
Forgiveness is a very hard lesson to learn. But once you do it, it is liberating.
Learning to forgive yes π once you complete, it might be worthwhile to make a list of all heads and post it on desktop as a reminder till we turn thirty…
I think we are harder on ourselves than anyone else is. Self-forgiveness is important for peace of mind.
Debbie @The Doglady’s Den
Wonderful post. I need to forgive myself for something I didn’t do a long time ago, working on it.
I need to forgive myself for taking some really bad wrong decisions in life, for being swayed away from realism. This decision has altered my life in unimaginable ways but I guess some good things have come out of it too π
Another nice post on philosophy of living a good life. Totally agree with you.
U know Richa – one of my biggets regrets i sbeing rude to dad and denying him his simplest pleasures in my stupidity :-/
I am a late sleeper too! And I finally fall asleep, my husband has already had a couple of hours of sleep. The time i spent trying to fall asleep is the time of negative thoughts,mostly. I start thinking about the the things i don’t have rather than concentrating on the good stuff. Sometimes i shed some tears. Thankfully over time, i have been able to control my thoughts towards positivity. And yes, it is very important to forgive oneself for several things in the past. But I am not able to do that completely till now.
https://natasha-pointstoponder.blogspot.in/2014/04/d-for-dalhousie.html
I havnt yet been able to forgive myself For being very rude to my father while growing up!! working on it and hoping someday I would!
Swathi
This made me remember one of our Tuesday’s with me … Whatever your write Richa just goes straight to the heart.. I want to forgive myself for not talking enough with my Mum and brothers, I want to forgive myself for falling in love for too long :), I want to forgive myself for those decisions that changed the course of my life ..I want to be happy with where I am
I do have few bad memories… But thankfully they don’t resurface much π I believe in forgiving myself and make up.
I do have few bad memories… But thankfully they don’t resurface much π I believe in forgiving myself and make up.
Loved your post. Forgiving yourself is as important as forgiving others. It’s like releasing all the negativity from within. ..Happy to visit you after a long break π
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I’ve created a fashion blog fashionstyleandyou.blogspot.in …I’d love you to visit and best of luck for the challenge.
I really appreciate your courage Richa.. Admitting your mistakes is hard enough.. writing them down doubly so. But then that’s the first step towards forgiveness.
Forgiveness is so important and sometimes we forget that it applies to us as well. Great post, thanks.
Tasha
Tasha’s Thinkings – AtoZ (Vampires)
Forgiving one’s self is by far the hardest of all forgivenesses.
A must, this one! To forgive ourselves is hard, but necessary!
Forgiving is a great art,though one cannot forget things.It really means it .Nice,Richa.
I agree to every word here. It is an important thing to learn to live peacefully further!
We bloggers are similar to each other in so many ways. It is the ultimate truth of life that we need to get a closure on and let things go off by forgiving our own selves. I have known this since long but I am yet to achieve it fully.
Hugs.
It can definitely be difficult to forgive ourselves and stop dwelling in the past, but in order to move ahead it simply has to be done. Wise words – thank you. π
So much wisdom in this, Richa. Sometimes we find it easier to forgive others than we do ourselves. From my experience, it’s an ongoing process.
Such a wise post. Its not easy to forgive oneself but has to be done…
Agree completely! We must truly learn to forgive ourselves. Forgiving does not erase the sad/bitter/embarrassing past. But it helps in healing us a lot!
I agree fully with you and will jot 25 mistakes of life in my personal diary. I am guilty of being rude to Dad and still regret doing that, kicking my ass and driving myself to the wall as well as other blunders I made in life. Thanks for this post, Richa and it’s making me feel better bout life. Ive also been very prejudicial to other communities during the growing up years that I regret. But, as Archana said, it’s not easy to forgive oneself and was also rude to a friend that I loved the most.
I will try and do what you have mentioned.. Most of the time I end up being so hard on myself…
forgiving yourself ??? quite heavy thinking .. can you ?
and thanks once again for your feedback
I’m very short tempered…and quite a few times have raised conundrums for it.. need to forgive myself for that…
I’ve always thought it is easier to forgive another than oneself. still learning π
This one line seems very easy, But seriously forgiving our self is probably is most hardest job , specially when guilt is involved. :/ You know whats another hardest Job ? Is to forgive your Ex when they dumped you… π that was the most hardest thing I did. π Forgive and forget π and move on π OK sorry I wenn off the topic a bit π ok ok forgiving our self is also important π Nice post by the way Richa JI
Sharing my fears and sorrows is still hard for me. And forgiving more than that. But thanks to some people in life who just understands even without uttering a word.
There’s a huge list that my run into pages. But the first and the biggest mistake for which I want to forgive myself is for ignoring my mother all along till I got married because I was conditioned by elders of the family that it is because of her greed that my Dad had to leave us alone and slog in the desert. By the time I realized my mistake, the main culprit had left for the heavenly abode. I have a lot to talk it out with her in person when I get up there or down there, depending on where she is. A thoughtful post it was Richa! And I do break down like this many a times.
So true, life isn’t worth living with all those backlogs and hating yourself for that… I think we all should do that, just sit alone and think, how can we move forward when we are so occupied from the guilt of the past… ?
a very thoughtful post Richa
Amritt